May 27, 2009

hump day

"Love is not blind-
it sees more, not less.
But because it sees more,
it is willing to see less."
- Julius Gordon
(borrowed from my friend mike's status...)
Today felt like the longest day ever.
Have you ever had those days? where everything seems to not go well? That was my day.
It probably started last night as I agonized over how to put my thoughts into an email. I finally finish it - waited to send it so the recipient would not accidentally stumble over it before getting off work. I pushed the send button and went to take out my contacts. As I pried - literally pried - my contacts off my eyeball - I had the fleeting thought, "this is not a good sign." My eye INSTANTLY turned bright pink...
For the past two months I thought I just had allergy problems, because the pollen this season has been off the charts. and perhaps that snowballed it - but spring allergies are basically no more in sunny - hott - Vegas. So last night - I was sure this could not be the case. I went to crawl in bed and read hoping my eyes would stop hurting so. They did not. In fact - I could HARDLY open them. As I received my few last texts from him - probably for the next few days - I just wanted to cry b/c the light from the phone was killing me. wait - I did cry - involuntarily.
So that is how I started my day - before I had even woken up my eyes hurt. and they hurt all day. Watering at will. which leads everyone to ask if I am okay - ha!
Then I had to type in 150+ checks - which I accidentally kept hitting the 'auto-fill' button. One would think this would make it easier - NO! you have to put them in order, and that just messes the system all up. some easy 10 min. task took me an hour - with someone else coming over and doing it b/c I was seriously on the verge of tears.
then I got 100 more checks from one person. Yeah I was ready to cry at that business. but no biggie - I conquered that one!
and then the day just drug on. on and on and on.
BUT tomorrow will be better -- because the
"sun will come up - tomorrow.
bet your bottom dollar that tomorrow -
there'll be sun."

May 25, 2009


I've been tagged! Packrat tagged me...So I thought why not - a little update on my life - and then you might glean some info from me! :)
The Rules:
Mention the person that tagged you.
Complete the lists of 8’s.
Tag 8 of your wonderful bloggy friends.
Go tell them you tagged them.

8 Things I Look Forward To:
1. fitting in my swim suite again -- w/o my 'love handle'.
2. Swing Dance class this Thursday.... :) whoot! I think I might try it.
3. Being debt free
4. Temple baptisms this friday
5. wedding receptions.... sick I know (3 in the next month...)
6. Oquirrh Mt. Temple Open House
7. Summer --- Swimming - Lake - water parties - tan! - getting in shape - movies in the park - icecream -
8. Achieving my goals... I just set some new ones... new start this week

8 Things I did Yesterday:
1. Slept
2. Went to church
3. Cried -- but not during church...whoot!
4. Sat by myself in the same room as him and didn't die.
5. Helped cook dinner...
6. Read my book
7. Texted
8. Talked to my family.... they love me.

8 Things I wish I could do:
1. Accompany people on the piano
2. Play the guitar.
3. Jump off Cliffs -- they terrify me... alot
4. See the future. that would be very helpful right now... :)
5. make more time in my day to finish everything!
6. go visit Cariann in az -- right this moment. random road trip - whoot!
7. Do Magic -- I think it would be fun... OH no -- I want to fly!!!
8. stop thinking about it......and him....

8 Shows I Watch:
1. So you Think you can Dance
2. Dancing with the stars
3. American Idol Finale
4. other shows my brother happens to be watching
5... I'm not home enough to really watch much else... if I even watch the above mentioned songs.

8 Bloggers:
Kim, Britt, Lindsay, Jenni, Kevin, Karalee, Pamela, Stef and any who want to do this. :)

May 24, 2009

Tonight I just want to cry

So I have.

Sometimes when life gets hard you just have to cry. Honestly there is nothing wrong with that.

But then you pick yourself back up - dust off your pants - and keep going. Because honestly, what else can you do?

I am greatful for my life experiences. Even the hard ones.

I will do an update post soon - promise - I am still alive. :)